heidzilla helps: thoughts on registering

as many late summer and early fall brides are, one of my great heidzilla-brides to be, jen, is about to register. she asked me for general insight on how my husband devin and i approached the process, and how we decided what to register for. i wrote her a rather long email and thought i’d share some of the insight here. 

in case you missed it, heidzilla bride to be, tara, shared her massive registry list with readers back in december. if you’d like it in word document form, shoot me an email and i’d be happy to send it to you.

disclaimer, this is obviously all personal preferences. also, i’d like to note, my husband could be considered a “foodie.”

thought process for registering:

1. We clicked through Macy’s, Dillards, Bed Bath & Beyond  and Crate and Barrel‘s sites and looked at the general categories. We decided to not look at Target‘s because I heard cashiers are awful about marking items off the registries and they have a terrible return policy. We also skipped Kohl’s since Macy’s and Dillard’s seemed to have more of what we were looking for.
2. Then we made of list of the stuff we DID have (Devin’s into cooking, so we did have a lot. Especially gadgets) and a list of what we DIDN’T have. Based on what we DID have, we took Bed Bath & Beyond and Crate and Barrel off our store list. We already had anything we’d register for at those two stores, although they’re VERY well known for their great registries. (And we did get some GREAT Crate and Barrel wedding gifts that we love and use weekly!)
3. So, looking at the NEED list – we sort of grouped it into a yes, maybe, we’ll see and in the future lists… to help us prioritize what to “beep” when we got to the stores. We wanted to see how many items would add up first… and if it seemed like we had enough we’d leave off the “we’ll sees.” The “in the future” list were things we just can’t fit in our house right now, or would want a new one of when we eventually move and change decor colors…. or would not register for and buy with gift cards post-wedding.
4. Then we took the super duper long registry list and deleted a bunch of stuff we wouldn’t be registering for. With our custom list, we did all our research. 
5. The two things we researched and selected before going into the store was a few china patterns to “handle” and decide upon once seen in hand and small appliances and which stores to register THOSE at. We picked appliances for Macy’s becausethey had the selection and china at Dillard’s because they had the better non-sale prices. Everything else was up to what we found in-stores.
6. We left the ALL small stuff research to in-store looking at only. You could make yourself crazy looking up those things… and they’re pretty much the same. 
7. We started at Dillards knowing that we wanted to do our china there – or you might start at the store where you know you’ll register for the most. We “beeped” the Kitchenaid Mixer FIRST. The mixer = wedding gifts and WIFEY to me, so I insisted on starting there.
8. We were sure to register for EVERYTHING and anything we thought we might want on our list and THEN took it off after going to both stores. It’s easy to manage the lists online.
9. It’s really difficult, but I tried not to registry stalk the couple of weeks before my shower. However, post shower 1, I was sure to check to see if everything was taken off my lists before shower 2 happened. The same for right before the wedding.
10. Don’t forget thank you cards within two weeks of receiving the gift. If your gifts came early in the mail, it’s two weeks from the day you got it, not from the day of your shower. (The rule goes to within two months for gifts given at the wedding.) 

And some “what to select” thoughts:

• We really wanted a stand mixer and went with Kitchenaid… Just seemed natural and they are built in Ohio (or maybe it is re-built?) Almost every store carries them AND all the attachments. That’s convenient for later down the road.
• For small appliances, we really liked this one Krups brand espresso/coffee maker. This was a “must” for us, although I know some people could care less about that type of appliance.From this piece we then decided upon the Krups toaster and blender. The same for other small appliances, if there’s one you like over others – it helps you pick the entire line of small appliances so they sort of match. We didn’t love some Cuisinart things but did get their griddler, deep fryer, electric knife and fondue set.
• Fondue set brings me to a good point: this is often one of those things people register for and never use. In my case, fondue is my favorite food. For others, it’s just a OOOH that’s $50 let’s beep. But stop, think – have you ever made anything with a fondue set, emulsion blender, waffle maker, quesadilla maker, etc.? If you’re not into those niche things NOW you probably won’t be in those niche things later…. ORRRR something other item you’re registering for (a regular blender or hand mixer, a George Foreman grill, etc.) will serve the same purpose for as often as you might want to make the niche things.
• Silverware does NOT have to be the same brand as your china. Pick UP the utensils and hold them like you do when you eat. I had some picked out online and when I grabbed a hold of them I HATED them. They were heavy or uncomfortable or just ugly… (We actually DID end up with the set that was the same name as our china… weird.)
• The beeper thingies usually don’t let you beep the things that are getting clearanced out, but do check your list online a few times post-registering to make sure nothing is unavailable. Note: some things ARE only available in stores or only available online, so don’t let that discourage you, just make sure the store still carries the products. Also, you’ll have a mix of in-store and not in-store shoppers so don’t worry if things are only available in one place or the other. 
• Register for the bigger ticket items you want. Don’t feel badly about it. Grandma wants to spend money on you, or your bridesmaids will want to go in on a gift together. You’ll be surprised what you get!
• Register for the smaller ticket items. Some people might find a $30 gift for you but want to add a few $5-$10 gifts to get it to the $50-$60 price point they want to spend. Or… they want some gift toppers… or someone (this is so something I LOVE to do) might go the day before the wedding and buy ALLL the little baby things left on your registry that add up to one big gift!
• Register for the Dyson. It’s probably my favorite thing we got… and most-used too, eh? Seriously.
• PLEASE don’t register for gift cards. Maybe that’s a personal peeve, but you’ll get them anyways… registering for them looks tacky. If the registry has them ON there already, see if you can take them off… You’re going to get gift cards at the stores you register at regardless. People KNOW you’ll gladly take gift cards for the stores you registered at because it’s highly likely you won’t get everything on your list. 
• No, sorry I really don’t have a lot of advice for people who want to do honeymoon registries… or “cash preferred” registries. 
• YES, I personally think it’s tacky if you list your registries in your wedding invitations. IMHO, there are two places to list those: in the shower invitations that the shower hosts send and on your wedding web site.  Word of mouth works well, too. If people don’t know where you’re registered and want to know, they’ll call you or someone related to you.

If you have any questions about registering or my favorite gifts, don’t hesitate to ask either via email, or in the comments section below!