heidzilla helps: uneven bridal parties

first of all, a big WAVE!!! my sincerest apologies for being away TWO weeks! my husband fell badly while skiing in ny. he was in the hospital (that was 4 hours away) for a week. he’s home recovering nicely now, and i’m back to blogging and heidzilling :) — 

 
uneven bridal parties.
it seems like the question i’ve been asked the most lately. “what do you think about uneven bridal parties?”

well… why not? if you have 6 BFFs, sisters and cousins and your fiance only has 4 BFFs, brothers and cousins, why should or would he ask two random dudes just to make it even? or vice versa? does it have to be even? no!

a bride-to-be friend of mine put it very nicely:

It should always and only be about having the people who mean the world to you stand by your side. Whether it’s one person or ten. If it’s one on one side and ten on the other, it shouldn’t matter (although that could look a little funny). More realistically, people probably are closer in the difference, like myself — I have eight and the groom has six. He agreed that you shouldn’t just find two more people to fill that void. What’s important is that those six and those eight mean something to us and that we’re happy with who we’ve chosen to stand beside us on our wedding day. 

let’s start with the PROS: where will it be nice to NOT ask a few extra people to be in your bridal party just to make it even?

1. need for a bigger limo: limos range in size, so if you decided to ask those two more distant cousins to be in your bridal party, it could bump up the size of limo you need to rent
2. lines in your program: seriously, this is just annoying when you’re trying to lay out your program copy and you can’t fit everything you need to in the space you have
3. photography: additional people to position in bridal party formal photos, and to get to smile at the same time as everyone else!
4. reception set up: extended length of head table
5. additional money: gifts you have to buy, rehearsal dinner meals to purchase, etc.
6. additional time: more people means more coordination – for dresses or tuxes and all the other details your plan with your bridal party
7. additional opinions: extra bridal party members means MORE cooks in the kitchen when it comes to planning your bachelorette party, showers, etc. or your fiance’s bachelor party, etc.

and now the CONS: where will having an uneven bridal party be a logistical problem?

1. lines in your program: if you are setting up the bridal party in columns side by side, one list will be shorter and might bother you. on a scale of 1 to 10 with 10 being the most annoying… this is like a 2?
2. less money: less bridesmaids means less people to split the cost of your shower or bachelorette party. having fewing BMs makes their portion of party costs higher
3. photography: you won’t be able to pair people up for group shots. but consider staggering people, especially if you have steps to use:
   BM/GM……..bride/groom……..BM/GM 
   ……..BM/GM…………….BM/GM……….
   BM/GM………..BM……..BM/GM……….
4. ceremony processional: did you plan to have your groomsmen accompany your bridesmaids down the aisle? can one groomsman take two bridesmaids or vice versa? or, just consider having the groomsmen walk down first, and then the bridesmaids walk down individually. do you have an extra bridesmaid who is related or close to the flower girl and ringbearer? have the three of them walk down together.
5. ceremony recessional: this is the walk down the aisle where the groomsmen and bridesmaids are paired and walk together. again, consider two boys to one girl, or two girls to one boy… even number of girls and odd number of boys? pair up the girls, have the guys walk behind them: GM – BM/BM – GM - BM/BM – GM - BM/BM – GM 
6. reception announcements: this is also usually done in pairs. if you only have one extra bridesmaid or groomsman, who can you announce by themselves, who would be comfortable, or outgoing enough to have fun with it? or, can you announce the single bm or gm with an usher, reader, or special family member?
7. head table: if you have one extra girl, put the girls to the left and the boys to the right. that puts the bride right in the center:
   BM - BM - BM - BM - BM - BM -  bride – groom – GM – GM- GM – GM – GM
   if you have two extra girls, mix and mingle the bridal party and start and end with girls (or vice versa)
   BM1 - GM1 - BM2 - GM2 - BM3 - bride – groom - BM4 - GM3 - BM5 - GM4 - BM6
   OR – go with a sweetheart table for just you and your groom, and seat your bridal party at other tables where it won’t be noticeable they are uneven 

are there places in your ceremony or reception that you can’t figure out how to coordinate your uneven bridal party? leave me a note!